As I sit in my local coffee shop writing this article, I’m thinking about what happens the day after Valentine’s Day. How many people are now like me (single)? How many people had a Valentine’s Day that is the envy of all of their friends? How many are having trouble recovering from the big day?
Now that V Day has passed, how are you dealing with the aftermath? Are you elated? Feeling let down? Still coming down from the festivities of the previous day? Wondering why you tried a new restaurant on such an important day? Did you call in sick? Did you simply survive it? Did you thrive? Did you score big points with your significant other? Maybe you decided to make your significant other much less significant. Since I am currently single (it wouldn’t change things even if I wasn’t), Valentine’s Day doesn’t concern me much, but I’m sure it concerns a lot of you and some of you maybe even messed it up.
Or maybe, things simple didn’t go as you had hoped. Maybe something hilarious happened that you’ll remember forever. Sometimes, even if your Valentine’s Day gets messed up, it can be a source of funny stories and laughter for years to come.
I was talking to my mom and she was laughing because she figures that my dad got her a card the only the day before. After being married so long, he knows that the card needs to be on the kitchen table first thing in the morning. I don’t know what would happen to him if he didn’t do that.
I’m certainly not a relationship expert, and I may have learned most of what I know about romance from soap operas, but I am single which gives me lots of time to observe what other people do, and spend some time thinking about funny things to say about it.
On that note, let’s talk about some funny and interesting things that may (or may not) happen in the aftermath of Valentine’s Day.
The Aftermath
I realize that this phrase sounds ominous. Like some sort of romance-apocalypse just happened and it’s now time to pick up the pieces. This could be true for some, and for others, it could mean that they have to piece together what they did last night. Many more may be wondering what happened to all of the chocolates and candies: “I couldn’t possibly have eaten them all yesterday!” True to my own advice, I stayed away from any stores selling Valentine’s Day paraphernalia, and who knows what the day after is looking like. The shelves have been picked-over, Easter chocolates are starting to move in, and someone out there is wondering why they got a pack of gum for Valentine’s Day (and the person who gave that gift may be wondering how to save their relationship). It reminds me of a famous line in the movie “Say Anything”, where John Cusack’s character says “I gave her my heart, and she gave me…a pen”.
The Valentine’s Day Romance Hangover
There may be some couples out there who are riding the wave of bliss of a perfect Valentine’s Day today, and into the weekend. They’re probably still on their sunny vacation in a warm climate. That definitely would make a difference for me. I feel better about most things if the sun is out. The introverts out there may be glad that the festivities are over and now they can come out from under the bed, knowing that the public displays of affection and crowds (restaurants and shops) associated with the day have diminished.
Break-ups
Don’t worry, I’m not going to tell you how to break up with somebody, whether you should or shouldn’t break up with somebody, or talk about my most recent break-up (there isn’t much of a story there anyway). However, I did hear something on the radio (yes, I listen to the radio) about a large number of people in Canada finding themselves single on the day after Valentine’s Day. The best way to get through this if it happened to you, is to wallow for a little bit, then get yourself some chocolate and a glass of red wine. Being (newly) single means you get all of the chocolate and wine to yourself if you want it. Are you all out of red wine? Call your friend who always has a spare bottle and go over to his/her place. They probably have chocolate too. Both chocolate and red wine have been shown in some studies at some point in time to have positive health benefits I think – even if it’s anecdotal evidence about getting through a Valentine’s Day break-up.
Uh-oh, you forgot
If you’re in a relationship, you’re toast. Skip to “The Recovery”. If you’re single, it doesn’t matter. I kept forgetting all week. If it weren’t for writing this article, I may have forgotten altogether.
The Recovery
If you didn’t get the card, the right chocolates, book the reservation, or were completely lacking in creativity with your Valentine’s gift-giving and you’re in a relationship with someone who cares about it (including somebody who says they don’t but they really do), then you’ve possibly got some work to do. I would suggest trying to get away with telling them you didn’t forget about V Day, you just forgot to mention that you were taking them out for dinner on the weekend instead – when it’s (hopefully) not so busy and you can spend more time gazing into each other’s eyes.
Single People
I’d like to give some attention to the single people and especially the single introverts in the crowd today (except the introverts won’t be in any sort of crowd). Let’s be clear to start off that being single is not a problem to be solved unless maybe, single is something you don’t want to be. You can be single and not want to be, but you can’t be desperate. That’s letting the pendulum swing too far the other way. It’s a fine line to walk. Just be careful about spending too much time on social media. You may come across that one “friend” in your list who shares something about the origins of Valentine’s Day. If you’re a romantic type, it’ll ruin V Day for you, so be careful.
In the days leading up to and following Valentine’s Day, nothing has changed for us single people. We’re still single. That doesn’t mean we can’t have some fun, or support a friend who just got dumped: “sorry, but he just doesn’t get how great you are – let’s drink some wine” (And I realize that this is the second time I’ve mentioned wine in this article. Not to worry – I’ve got a friend booked for a Galentine’s day celebration for this weekend). There are many excuses or let’s call them reasons to drink wine, and supporting a friend through a bad Valentine’s Day experience, or a break-up is one of them. It might sound like I would be glad that a friend broke up with someone so that I had a reason to drink wine, but really, it’s not like that. I don’t need an excuse to have a glass of wine. I’m single. I can do whatever I want for whatever reason, as long as it matches with my life goals.
What Happens Next
While V Day was fun for some (and not so fun for others), returning to normal everyday life where chocolate is rectangular instead of heart shaped, diamonds are simply beautiful, sparkling rocks, and a night out for dinner is because there’s no food in the house; there is something about the calm that sets in a few days later. The chaos is done and boxes are stacked in the aisles of stores getting ready for the next rush of holiday celebration and gift-giving. We humans do funny things, and it makes me laugh a lot. Now we just have to ride the wave of laughter into the next round of funny things we do.
How was your Valentine’s Day? How are you enjoying the aftermath?
LIVE FUNNY! with Kathryn Reichheld 